berwithfilmnnonsense

filmNnonsense

They say: enjoy the uncertainty

I say: Uncertainty is like getting stuck. In my case, im in a quicksand. What again am I supposed to enjoy?

Annual General Meeting.

i stayed for it throughout afterall.

somehow i'm finding it super tough to say goodbye to this once-super-big love of my life. WHOLE LOT OF DRAMA MAN. ask me for details. can't wait to tell you. HOHOHO.

anyway, i made cards for the outgoing exco and one of my girlfriend that was stepping up... she was having so much trouble convincing herself that she actually wants this. i'm worried for her. i don't actually really want her to get the post... but somehow because its her, i'm relieved.

when AGM ended, i wanted to shout

ITS OVERRRR!!! ALL THE STRUGGLES AND RUBBISH IS GONE!

-__-

if only its that easy to start over.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------meow

During economics class

'Savers can lend to the world'

I hate the fact that i hate school but i care about it.
That project works are killing me.

I am trying to do this trade-off with friends and grades, although I must say I'm really getting better at it.
Losing sleep over friends is worth it. Getting pissed with people over projects isn't. One of my friends got this "i am disappointed in you" kind of statements from a fellow groupmate.
I hope it won't get any more worse than this! We are a team okay everybody!!!

Losing a few hours to study is worth it when I know my friends need me more than anything. I flipped through my brother's graduation booklet. Over the 15 minutes of browsing, I realised most people wrote things like "I wish i studied less and made more friends"-type of statement.

Its something that everyone wrote but few committed to. Its something I see in other yearbooks as well.

I am determined to not be consumed by schoolwork. I skipped so many things during mid-term. Consort, Singing, Korean.

I really regret it now. I don't want to graduate and write things like "if only i spent more time with friends and things I really love". I'm going to do it now.

Of course its easy to say lah.

I got lost somewhere along the way, until the day I spouted LIFE IS TOO SHORT.

I think there's this amazing power of spoken words (on me, at least).

You should try it. say LIFE IS TOO SHORT. Let the words settle. Tell me if it works for you.

_________________________________________________________________________

Aftermath (yep, after the lines come the emo-ness and reflection)

Post-withdrawal-aftermath from the love of my life - sound and events.

This is serious man. That day i walked past an event where a friend of mine was sound engineer. I touched the mixer and I was so, so, missing that feeling. I saw a gaffer (fyi, its just a roll of tape), and i smiled. like so wdh right.

Truthfully, I miss 'be' more than anything in the world. The Old one. Not the Nazi-fied one it is now. I don't see people smiling in the room anymore, no more jokes, just pure sacarsm and full-fledged backstabbing action. I miss my friends who arent themselves anymore. I guess I'm not that forgiving a person. I find it easier to hide from them than to point out what i felt wasn't going quite right.

I MISS BE. REALLY. I DO.

I miss doing events together at Suntec.

I miss taking late night cabs that are claimable.

I miss the tauhway gatherings.

I miss taping down and setting up.

I miss tearing tapes and tearing down.

That's all because we used to do it together.

I miss us.

today was generally a bad day, woke up and realised my 1.5 years in BE was really nothing compared to heresay.

really really bad day.

until i saw tohby's nick

and i cried.

terrrrrrr - don't give up, you are loved.

never knew the power of msn nicks? well, here you go.

Someone went to upload the gradnite vid that hweif and i made on youtube...

must watch after the whole thing is streamed okay! got momentum one. HAHAHA

SHOUTOUT TO HWEIF (who wont be seeing this anyway)...
thanks for teaching me so much 'bout final cut :) im starting to love it more and more!!! :D

anyway... ya.. its after this video that i felt that even though there were not-so-happy times getting this whole event run and we run like mad people in dresses...

this is really cool.

this gradnight.

i wouldn't exchange it for anything else in this world :)

Labels: Gradnite 09

was watching The Strangers today.

I know the feeling of murdering a friend.

Im guilty!

If there could be any proper mode of punishment I would be more than wiling to.
If time could backtrack like tapes do, I'd pay my ass off to.
I'd save everything, even if I had to break bones or.. idunno.. die?. really.
If I could muster the courage forgo hz for run2, I would. I'm sorry.
If saying sorry helps, I hope this one does.

this is not helping, is it?

I'm watching you die as you writhe before me.

and im wondering...

why's all the punishment on you, not me?